Deceived, Seduced, Advised, Uplifted: A Defense of Eve

Hail, Eve, full of courage,

the Serpent is with thee.

Blessed art thou amongst women

and blessed is the fruit of thy tree, Knowledge.

Holy Eve, Mother of All,

pray for your children,

now and in the hour of our need.

Nema.

Aside perhaps from Satan himself, few figures of myth have been so thoroughly slandered as Eve. The fabled first (or second?) woman has been blamed for the loss of paradise, for the origin of sin, and even for human mortality. She’s been portrayed as stupid, or wicked, or both. Christians condemn her disobedience to God and her temptation of Adam. Surprisingly, some Satanists also deride her, for reasons I can’t quite fathom. Is it her supposed submissiveness to Adam being mocked when Satanists say, “Always be Lilith, never Eve”? Some non-Satanic feminists try to redeem her with bumper-sticker slogans like “Eve was framed.” By calling her innocent, they reduce her to a passive victim, and join in the condemnation of her supposed crime: curiosity, knowledge-seeking, and thinking for herself.

For two thousand years, ideas about Eve have been shaping the Christian attitudes that dominate humanity. Be careful how you think of Eve, because how you think of Eve is how you think of women, sex, marriage, obedience, authority, and transgression.

Today, let us think about her deeply, and even rethink her if necessary. 

First of all, let’s put this ‘Eve versus Lilith’ thing to bed. It’s a false dichotomy. The two are far more similar than they are different. Both have been called the first woman. Both have been married to Adam. Both defied God and were punished for it. Both are mothers—prolific mothers, even—Lilith as the mother of demons,[i] Eve as the mother of humanity.[ii]

But their similarities go even deeper. Many stories we now associate with Lilith were originally about Eve.[iii] Long before the legend of Lilith developed, Eve was said to have lain with Samael, the serpent, and given birth to demons.[iv]

According to this legend, the serpent sexually seduced Eve to get her to eat the apple. This interpretation depends on the ambiguous translation of a certain word in Genesis 3:13:

“The serpent deceived me, and I ate.”[v]

The word here translated as “deceived” is “hish’iani.” We are going to be talking a lot about the potential meanings of this word.

Here’s the main thing to understand: because Biblical Hebrew was written without vowels, many words in it can be read as several different words. Imagine, for example, that instead of writing PIT, P-I-T, we wrote P-T. P-T could then be PIT, PET, POT, PAT, PUT, POUT, PEAT, PATE, and so on. That’s what’s going on in the Hebrew Bible. From the perspective of Jewish scriptural interpretation, this is seen as a feature, not a bug—something that adds richness and nuance to the text.

So this word, “hish’iani,” usually translated as “deceived” or “beguiled,” has numerous other potential meanings. One of them shares a root with a word for “marriage,” and so some Rabbis concluded that the snake enticed Eve into martial relations.[vi] In other words, they fucked. Genesis 3:13 becomes:

“The serpent seduced me, and I ate.”

According to other sources, after the fall from Eden, Eve and Adam separated for a time, during which Eve gave birth to many demons by Samael, and Adam fathered his own infernal children with Lilith.[vii] In these versions of the story, Cain is considered to be Eve’s son by Samael.[viii]

Talking of Cain’s paternity, what the Bible has to say about that sheds light on another interesting parallel between Lilith and Eve: both of them know the forbidden name of God, and neither is afraid to speak it out loud. Lilith famously utters the Tetragrammaton which causes her to transform into a demon and fly up out of Eden.[ix] Eve says it as well, after Cain is born:

“With the help of the LORD I have brought forth a man.”[x]

Only she doesn’t say “The Lord” (Adonai). She says YAHWEH. For the record, this is the first time anyone says the forbidden name in the Bible. Lilith is supposed to be the first one to say it at all,[xi] but Eve says it first in the holy book. [xii] There’s a lot more lore about this verse that I think Pastor Vix is going to be talking about, but suffice to say, that not only does Eve say the forbidden name out loud, she also kinda makes it sound like Yahweh is the one who knocked her up. That’s right—there were some old interpretations wherein Cain’s daddy was not Samael, but GOD himself. (Interestingly, in some Kabbalistic texts, Lilith is said to seduce God as well.)

Some interpreters believe there was no snake in Eden at all—just the woman. In other words, Eve herself was the serpent.[xiii] Lilith has also been called a serpent.[xiv] Even more radically, maybe there was no tree either—just Eve herself, the forbidden fruit, her body.[xv]

Just to put a cherry on top of the Lilith/Eve comparison, Lilith the Elder (or Eisheth Zenunim) is also called Eve the Matron. So she’s the elder Lilith and the elder Eve.[xvi]

Here, we come to the end of similarities and the beginning of differences. Lilith left; Eve stayed. Lilith looked out for herself; Eve looked out for Adam. Their choices represent poles of selfishness and generosity—both of which, for the record, were good things in their context. Both selfishness and selflessness can be admirable or destructive depending, and both Lilith and Eve made the choices that were right for them.

And it was indeed a choice that Eve made. Far from being the Devil’s dupe, Eve is shown in scripture to be a the first thinker.

First of all, she adds to what she has been told. God told Adam that if he ate from the tree of knowledge he would die.[xvii] Eve concludes from this that it’s better not to even touch the tree at all![xviii] And after the serpent tells Eve that she won’t die, but in fact she will become as God, knowing good and evil,[xix] she doesn’t just take his word for it. No, she examines the tree and thinks about it:

When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it.[xx]

These may be simple, basic feats of reasoning, but remember that they are being performed by a newly made being without knowledge of good and evil. Eve seems to have something of the fruit in her before she even eats. She is drawn to knowledge in a way that Adam is not.

And of course, she was right, and not deceived at all. God admits to all his own lies:

And the Lord God said, “The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever.”[xxi]

So according to Yahweh himself, Eve and Adam did in fact become as gods. They did not die immediately, and its also clear that they were never going to live forever anyway, since God prevents them from eating the fruit of life and becoming immortal. So much for “deception.”

Let’s return to that pesky Hebrew word, hish’iani or his’iyani. Written with one vowel marker it means “deceived” or “seduced,” but with another it means “advised.”[xxii] Eve has not believed a lie; she has taken good advice. Now Genesis 3:13 becomes:

“The serpent advised me, and I ate.”

John Milton’s Eve has frequently been condemned as foolish and submissive. I have to wonder if those who say so have even read Paradise Lost. Milton expands on Eve’s reasoning process thus:

“For good unknown, sure is not had, or had

And yet unknown, is as not had at all.

In plain then, what forbids he but to know,

Forbids us good, forbids us to be wise?

Such prohibitions bind not.”[xxiii]

Irrefutably persuasive words, and not the words of a fool or a doormat, either.

Furthermore, having eaten the fruit, Milton’s Eve is briefly tempted to level the playing field between her and Adam. She knows that God has created her as Adam’s inferior, and wisely realizes that hierarchy is the death of love. Perhaps by keeping this new power to herself, she can even the odds:

“…the more to draw his Love,

And render me more equal, and perhaps,

A thing not undesirable, sometime

Superior: for inferior who is free?”[xxiv]

This impulse loses out to her genuine love for Adam. She can’t do to him what was done to her and leave him in an inferior position. And so, she shares the fruit.

Milton is infamous for his sympathy for the Devil, and sympathizes to an extent with Eve as well, but as a protestant Christian he could not make the ultimate leap to viewing Eve as a heroine, even a savior. However, that leap had already been made thousands of years before, by certain Gnostic sects.

In a Gnostic text called “On the Origin of the World,” we read passages like these:

After the day of rest, [Wisdom] sent [Life], her daughter… as an instructor to raise up Adam, in whom there was no soul, so that those whom he would beget might become vessels of light. When Eve saw her co-likeness cast down, she pitied him, and she said, “Adam, live! Rise up on the earth!” Immediately her word became a deed. For when Adam rose up, immediately he opened his eyes. When he saw her, he said, “You will be called ‘the mother of the living’ because you are the one who gave me life.”[xxv]

Notice the repetition of the phrase “raise up.” That’s another potential translation of that word, his’iyani, which describes what the serpent did to Eve. Here is our final iteration of Genesis 3:13:

“The serpent raised me up, and I ate.”

In Gnostic texts such as these, Eve represents a higher, spiritual awareness from which Adam has become separated, and with which he must reunite to be whole and free. To these Gnostics, Eve was a spiritual liberator, who had listened to the wisdom of the Serpent, a spiritual teacher often equated with Christ himself.[xxvi]

I prefaced this sermon with one familiar text; now we will follow it up with another. Many of you have heard the reading of Adrian S. Kayn’s adaptation of Thunder, Perfect Mind. Previously, I’d been told this ancient Gnostic text was about an “unidentified Goddess,” but during my researches for this sermon, I learned there is little ambiguity as to who the speaker is.

I am the first and the last.

I am the honored one and the scorned one.

I am the whore and the holy one.

I am the wife and the virgin.

I am the bride and the bridegroom,

And it is my husband who begot me.

I am knowledge and ignorance…

I am foolish and I am wise…

I am the one whom they call Life

And you have called Death…[xxvii]

Begotten by her husband—born of Adam’s side—honored and scorned, called both wise and ignorant, credited with death but her name is Life—what could be the answer to this riddle other than Eve?

Hail, Eve, full of courage,

the Serpent is with thee.

Blessed art thou amongst women

and blessed is the fruit of thy tree, Knowledge.

Holy Eve, Mother of All,

pray for your children,

now and in the hour of our need.

Nema.


[i] “Alphabet of Ben Sira 78: Lilith,” Jewish Women’s Archive, accessed September 18, 2024, https://jwa.org/node/23210.

[ii] Genesis 3:20.

[iii] Wojciech Kosior, “A Tale of Two Sisters: The Image of Eve in Early Rabbinic Literature and Its Influence on the Portrayal of Lilith in the Alphabet of Ben Sira,” Nashim: A Journal of Jewish Women’s Studies & Gender Issues 32, no. Spring 2018, 112-113.

[iv] Kosior, 119.

[v] Genesis 3:13, NIV.

[vi] “Gen 3:13 Did the Snake ‘Trick’ or ‘Advise’ Eve to Eat? – Mi Yodeya,” Mi Yodeya, accessed October 22, 2026, https://judaism.stackexchange.com/questions/135995/gen-313-did-the-snake-trick-or-advise-eve-to-eat.

[vii] Moses DeLeon, “Acharei Mot – Chapter 59,” Zohar.Com, n.d., accessed October 22, 2026, https://www.zohar.com/zohar/Acharei%20Mot/chapters/59.

[viii] Kosior, 119.

[ix] Ben Sira.

[x] Genesis 4:1, NIV.

[xi] Kosior, 115.

[xii] Kosior, 118.

[xiii] Kosior, 119.

[xiv] Moses De Leon, “Samael and the Wife of Harlotry,” Full Zohar Online – Vayetze – Chapter 4, n.d., accessed September 19, 2024, https://www.zohar.com/zohar/Vayetze/chapters/4.

[xv] Stephen Greenblatt, The Rise and Fall of Adam and Eve (New York, NY: W.W. Norton & Company, 2018), 254.

[xvi] Isaac Ben Jacob Ha-Kohen, “Treatise on the Left Emanation,” essay, in The Early Kabbalah, ed. Joseph Dan, trans. Ronald C Kiener (Mahwah, New Jersey: Paulist Press, 1986),173.

[xvii] Genesis 2:17, NIV.

[xviii] Genesis 3:3, NIV.

[xix] Genesis 3:4-5, NIV.

[xx] Genesis 3:6, NIV.

[xxi] Genesis 3:22, NIV.

[xxii] Manis Friedman, “What REALLY Happened in the Garden of Eden?,” YouTube, n.d., accessed October 22, 2026, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MOqWD4sfk5U&t=840s.

[xxiii] John Milton, Paradise Lost (New York: Modern Library, 2008), 308.

[xxiv] Greenblatt, 224-225.

[xxv] James M. Robinson et al., The Nag Hammadi Library in English (San Francisco: Harper San Francisco, 1977), 172.

[xxvi] Elaine H. Pagels, Adam, Eve and the Serpent (New York: Vintage Books, 1989), 66-68.

[xxvii] Pagels, 67.

Updated Church Reading List

This is Church of the Morningstar by Church of the Morningstar

An anthology of writings by members of our church, the best introduction what what we, specifically, have been doing. Draws heavily on the texts that follow in this list, among many others– check the bibliography for more to read after you finish this list!

The Devil: A New Biography by Phillip C. Almond

A history of the idea of the Devil written for a popular audience. Well-researched and fun!

The Rise and Fall of Adam and Eve by Stephen Greenblatt 

A history of the story of Adam and Eve, written by an academic for a popular audience, also very entertaining!

The Book of Lilith by Barbara Black Koltuv

Jungian psychoanalytic text that happens to contain more Lilith myths than we have ever seen gathered anywhere else. 

Children of Lucifer by Ruben van Luijk

Essential text on the history of Satanism. Long and a bit academic, but don’t let it scare you– this is a wild ride!

Lucifer: Princeps by Peter Gray

Book on the history of the figure of Lucifer written from a Luciferian perspective. Author is unfortunately now a weird anti-vaxxer but the book generally holds up. 

The Marriage of Heaven and Hell by William Blake

One of the earliest “Satanic” texts. Blake sees God and Satan as both essential and in need of reconciliation. Highlight: the Proverbs of Hell. 

Paradise Lost by John Milton

Unintentionally origin of Satan as hero. At minimum read Book I. 

Stories from Ancient Canaan by Michael David Coogan

Curious about Baal, Beelzeub or Belphegore? Learn about the origin of this/these demon/s as a Canaanite God. 

Satan’s Silence by Debbie Nathan and Michael Snedeker

Great book about the Satanic Panic. 

The Lesser Key of Solomon or Ars Goetia

Not something to read cover to cover but you will be referencing this rolodex of demons for the rest of your Satanic life. Why not get a copy?

Satanism: a Reader by Per Faxneld, Johan Nilsson

Anthology of texts by various significant Satanic groups and individuals, with academic commentary. 

The Bible by various 

Or at the very least, familiarize yourself with these passages, chapters and books: Genesis 3, Genesis 11:1-9, Isaiah 14:12-14:21, Luke 4:1-4:12 and/or Matthew 4:1-4:11, Revelation.

The Synagogue of Satan by Stanislaw Przybyszewski

NOT to be confused with the antisemitic conspiracy text of the same name. This book is not concerned much with Jews at all. Rather, this is one of the earliest blatantly Satanic writings. Author’s name is pronounced, as best as we can manage, sher-bi-SHEV-ski. 

La Sorcière by Jules Michelet

Not to be taken as accurate witchcraft history, but rather as a masterpiece of proto-Satanic mythmaking. Michelet does for the figure of the Witch what Milton did to Satan, turning her into a rebellious romantic heroine.

The Satanic Bible by Anton LaVey

You should probably read this for the historic value. It is foundational, after all. 

The Devil’s Party ed. by Per Faxneld and Jesper Aa. Peterson

Anthology of academic essays about various Satanic groups and figures of historical importance.

I Can’t Self-Govern For You

A public statement of Pastor Johnny to Church of the Morningstar on 1/4/2025.

Back when I was first thinking of starting a Satanic church, I had a chatty Uber driver one night. I confessed to him that I was an aspiring pastor, although not what kind. 

“Put the pews in a circle,” he told me. “Pass the mic.” 

With these words, he expressed his desire for a different kind of religion– one that was less top-down, more diffuse and democratic. He’d articulated something I also wanted. Put the pews in a circle. Pass the mic. 

In the early days of Church of the Morningstar, that’s what we did. Back in San Francisco, we all saw each other face to face and knew each other’s names. It was easier to make sure that everyone was familiar with the non-hierarchical norms of the church. Everyone seemed to feel comfortable speaking up, giving their opinions, leading rituals, preaching sermons. Mass was an event that we all made happen together. 

But with the lockdown, we had to go online, and things changed. There were suddenly a lot more members, who knew each other less. Thoroughly onboarding every single new person was too time consuming for our small volunteer clergy, so we hoped people would get a feel for the church’s intentions and culture through our website and published writings. We thought we had laid those things out pretty clearly and publicly. 

And maybe we had. But what a church says, and what a church does, can be very different. People didn’t necessarily take those statements seriously. It seems that for a variety of reasons– some of which have to do with the religious trauma we all carry, and some of which have to do with my “strong,” i.e. sometimes overbearing personality– people haven’t always trusted in our invitations to participate, contribute, take leadership, and make this church in your image.

Now, I enjoy leading. I always have. In the beginning, I thought it was quite possible that power would corrupt me. I assumed I would have to keep an eye on myself, because I might like being in control too much.

Things worked out very differently. Having ended up with a type of authority that I did not ask for and did not want, I find that I actually hate it. There is no money and very little glory in being pastor of this church, just hard work, intense responsibility, and the endless sacrifice of my weekends. I’ve burned myself out emotionally supporting congregants. I’ve exhausted myself constantly creating new programming for our masses, with minimal input from anyone else but Vix. When I’ve tried to start discussions in the church, I have been met with silence, because people are afraid to disagree with me or say anything against what they perceive to be our “official dogma”– in spite of the fact that we try to be clear that we do not have one! 

People defer to me in a way that I never wanted them to. People feel unqualified to take leadership roles, and unwelcome to contribute their ideas, their art, their rituals, and their opinions, to making this church richer, more interesting, and more diverse. I have tried to solicit all of those things multiple times, in multiple ways:

  • with calls for submissions to the church anthology book which is now in the works
  • with invitations to have your art featured on the Church of the Morningstar website on the “art collective” page
  • with pauses in every mass to ask if anyone has anything they want to say, share or present
  • with requests for participation and interactivity in mass via invitations to read aloud, speak parts of incantations, or take part in discussions
  • with solicitations before masses for rituals, poems, writings, songs, etc that people may wish to submit for inclusion 
  • with invitations to collaborate on the church by-laws and constitution
  • with elections that I literally beg people to run in and vote in 

Yet it seems that much of this is not taken as being in good faith, and I think this is partially because of how aspects of my personality come across. 

I know I have a strong personality, as has been mentioned before. I know that at my worst, “strong” is a euphemism for “aggressive and overbearing.” But I am not loud and forceful because I want to crush people down and make them meek and quiet. I am loud and forceful because I want loud, forceful friends. I was raised by a huge, Southern, lapsed Catholic father who argued with me like I was an adult man back when I was still a tiny alleged girl of about four years old. I learned to meet his fire with fire fearlessly because no matter how loud we yelled at at each other, at the end I always knew my dad would smile at me and say “we butt heads like this because we are so alike. I love you.” Now, that’s not how most relationships work. I’ve learned that the hard way. And yet, in spite of decades of evidence to the contrary, at my core I still expect my strength to be met with strength. 

I will be real with you. I am getting burned out. I envisioned starting this church and having it grow into a self-governing community that needs no leaders. I had hoped to make myself obsolete as a pastor. In the last couple of years, I have become very stressed, sad, tired and lonely in my life because too many of the people I know seem to be looking up to me and placing me above them, leading me to feel as if I have no peers– this in spite of the fact that I fundamentally believe that all of you are my peers. 

I want comrades and co-collaborators and co-conspirators, not followers. I do not believe any of you are followers by nature. You’re Satanists. You’re walkers of the left hand path. You are here, or so I believe, because you dislike authority and seek empowerment; because you are curious and desire knowledge; because you don’t want to be told what to think or what to do. 

I desperately want to change the culture in this church. I don’t want to be at the top of it anymore. But I can’t do that alone. I need your help. Obviously I can’t do your self-governing for you. You have to do that. That’s the point. 

I have to confess that if the culture of this church doesn’t change, if it doesn’t end up living up to the values and vision with which I co-founded it, I will most likely burn out in another year, and step down as pastor. In that case, very likely nobody else will feel empowered to step up, and the online branch of CotMS will end. 

I am not trying to threaten you. But if you want this church, you have to make this church, and make it the church you want. I am not being paid anything for this, and I don’t want to keep making a church for people who appear to passively consume it with what seems to me to be diminishing enthusiasm. 

It is still my calling to be a priest of Satan, no matter what happens, but if we can’t make this church a church for us all, rather than just the Vix and Johnny Show, I will need to pursue that dream in a different form. 

You have the power. This can be what you want it to be. Vix and I are just making it up as we go along, after all. Yeah I went to seminary, but most of what it got me was just student debt. I went half for the skills and half for the credentials, so that non-Satanists would be forced to take us a bit more seriously. And Vix? I know he intimidates you with his intellect, but his highest attainment of formal education was fucking beauty school. He just reads a lot. We don’t really have anything you don’t have. 

So today’s message is: you can just do things. That’s what we do. We just do things, and then for some reason everyone thinks we know what we’re doing. You can too. You can just decide to hold a ritual or event. You can start a reading group. You can hop in the voice chat and start a lively debate. You can write a poem, a prayer, an article, a hymn, and submit it to be put on the church blog or in the church book. You can lead a segment of mass. You’re allowed. You have permission. 

But at some point, when you have the time and bandwidth to think hard about hard things, I do hope you will ask yourselves this question: why did I need so much permission? 

Guest Post: What is an Inner God? by Frater Babalon

Homily at Church of the Morningstar on 3/18/2023

So as part of my theology I firmly believe that every human being is possessed of an inner god.  This god is utterly benevolent towards the person it is a part of.  They love us, as we ought to love ourselves.  They are the part of us that knows how to keep moving, to keep loving through the hardest shit in the world.  They can banish any frightening spiritual force.  They give us our capacity for compassion, and moral reasoning.

It’s weird, but I think most of us have experienced something like our inner god at some point.  That voice within us that is kind, and that holds us together in the face of hardship.  It is the voice that gets you through.  And it can be drowned out by so many things in life, fear and other people’s unkindness, our own pain, innumerable things.  I don’t believe the world is naturally a just place.  I don’t think the ledger is balanced by some divine hand in the end.  Justice is up to us.  So I don’t think that our inner gods can always yell over the din, we have to find a way to listen.  They are a resource we can turn to if we know how.  

The inner god is a concept about which I still have a lot of theological questions.  Are inner gods one per person?  Given the same information, will all inner gods reach the same moral conclusion?  If morality is too complex to be axiomatic (as in reduced to a series of axioms) but they would come to the same conclusion, would that be to suggest there is some absolute morality?  Objectively true in itself?  But of course, I think there is usually more than one “right” answer to most things, and of course there are a lot of times where there’s not really a good answer, just a lot of least bad answers and unavoidable collateral damage.

But I mean I suppose, despite their lack of omnipotence, inner gods are the closest thing to the vast and ineffable “big god” style gods to me.  Every human being contains that sacredness, and of course, the sacred is also the potentially dangerous, isn’t it?  We all know about wrathful gods.  I think a mistreated god is likely to become a wrathful god.  As well, I don’t know whether if everyone truly listened to their inner god if there would be no conflict?  I’m not sure it would.  I do not think we live in a clockwork universe where when everything is “working properly” we function as a well oiled machine, each piece fitting perfectly into place, never bashing into one another.  We’re not a puzzle with loops and blanks perfectly aligned, destined to make a perfect whole if we all just find our right place, I think.  But if that’s true… what is this?  What is it for?  Why do we have it?  How do we do it?

This is a hard sermon to write, because for me the inner god is so deeply a felt experience, that trying to describe it, to explain a rational theology of the inner god, to explain what conclusions I draw from this felt experience, and I think it’s a good exercise, a useful thing to actually think about.  I think it must be for something in a way, but of course like any idea of human life having a purpose, anything articulable is unsatisfactory.  If we were to know that the purpose of human life is to provide the… specific atmospheric conditions necessary for the universe to function optimally as a doorstop for the cosmic crystalline unicorn that exists outside of time, that would still be unsatisfactory because then we’d wonder what the unicorn was for.  

But of course “forness” is like… a concept that exists within human life.  Purpose is something that exists on too small and specific a scale to cover a whole life I think.  It’s like asking “what color is a human life?” there’s too much color in a human life to answer the question, there are too many human lives to answer the question.  I don’t know.

Now, of course, believing every human being is divine and being as you all know, not someone who preaches pacifism or tolerance for injustice, is a complex thing.  What does it mean to believe in the divinity of humanity and to acknowledge that as long as there is oppression, there may be the necessity of things like wars?

Well, I mean to me it means acknowledging the full weight of that.  The full weight of both the need to combat all oppression and the true potential cost of combating it.  It requires a serious commitment to thinking about the strategies you employ and choices you make.

I do think that there is something to be said for trying to listen for the inner god.  I think we’re happier and generally kinder to one another when we do, but how and why that works?  That’s a mystery of my faith, the way the nature of the trinity might be to a Christian.

I don’t know, it’s the thing that keeps you moving when it’s freezing and you’ll die if you don’t keep walking.  It’s the thing you hold onto.  That’s what I’ve got.  That’s all I’m sure of.

Exit from Eden: On Our Lack of Filial Piety

GENESIS 3 

Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?

2 And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden:

3 But of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die.

4 And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die:

5 For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil.

6 And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.

7 And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons.

8 And they heard the voice of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God amongst the trees of the garden.

9 And the Lord God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where art thou?

10 And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.

11 And he said, Who told thee that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?

12 And the man said, The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.

13 And the Lord God said unto the woman, What is this that thou hast done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.

14 And the Lord God said unto the serpent, Because thou hast done this, thou art cursed above all cattle, and above every beast of the field; upon thy belly shalt thou go, and dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life:

15 And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.

16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

17 And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life;

18 Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field;

19 In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.

20 And Adam called his wife’s name Eve; because she was the mother of all living.

21 Unto Adam also and to his wife did the Lord God make coats of skins, and clothed them.

22 And the Lord God said, Behold, the man is become as one of us, to know good and evil: and now, lest he put forth his hand, and take also of the tree of life, and eat, and live for ever:

23 Therefore the Lord God sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from whence he was taken.

24 So he drove out the man; and he placed at the east of the garden of Eden Cherubims, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the tree of life.


The Bible passage I just read you is Chapter 3 of Genesis– in the King James translation, for no special reason except that it’s pretty. 

This is probably the most important text to Satanism. The story of the Fall from Eden is a strange one. Like the serpent himself, it has been provoking people to doubt and to ask questions for centuries– actually, for millenia. 

If you’re in this church today, you’ve probably thought hard about this story before. You probably already think that God was a controlling asshole for denying Adam and Eve knowledge of good and evil. You might think of the serpent as a messiah, saving Eve and her husband from ignorance and powerlessness. You may see Eve as a hero for bravely accepting the serpent’s challenge, risking death for a chance at knowledge. 

This story can be read and dissected in endless ways. This text is rich and deep, and every line of it deserves analysis. Today, however, I’m going to talk about this story in one specific way– as a parable about coming of age. 

I don’t believe this story, or any of the other stories we tell, is literal truth. This is not history. This is not a record of fact. However, to me, it is still undeniably true. It’s not a story about something that happened– it’s a story about things that happen, all the time, all around us, in every life– because we all grow up. 

Eve and Adam exist in childlike innocence. All of their physical needs are provided for by the Garden. They need no clothes, because the weather is always mild. They eat the fruit of all the trees and plants around them– except for one. They don’t have to think for themselves, because God, their father, tells them what to do.

Some people think of Eden as a time of innocent bliss, a state we should all yearn to return to. Some people think of childhood that way as well. After all, it should be a simple and protected existence. Complications like making decisions, having sex, or fending for yourself to survive have not yet been introduced. No wonder some people miss childhood, and romanticize Eden. 

But you are sitting here in this church, and so, that’s probably not the way you feel about childhood. 

I can speak only from anecdotal evidence based on the Satanists, Luciferians, and other Left-Hand-Pathers who I know, but the single most predictive trait for converting to these paths seems to be a complicated relationship with childhood and one’s parents. We are almost all people who, like Eve and Adam, were compelled to break away from parental authority. All humans have to do this at some point, to a greater or lesser extent. For us, perhaps, it was a stronger compulsion than for others. This may have been due to trauma, abuse, control, neglect, overprotectiveness, smothering, or indoctrination into an oppressive religion. This may have been because we turned out queerer or transer or more physically disabled or less neurotypical than our parents may have liked. 

God supposedly made Eve and Adam in his image. Many parents try to make their children in their images, attempting to mold them into little copies of themselves. But as much as we may all be like our parents in certain ways, children are always more than the sum of their progenitors. 

It is inevitable that a child will develop questions, curiosity, and free will. No matter how sheltered or how strictly controlled, sooner or later, a serpent gets into the garden. The child encounters something that makes them think, that makes them yearn for more. Maybe it’s a new friend, a book, a movie, a band. 

For me, my serpent was this story itself. As a child I was sent to Waldorf, a bizarrely religious system of schools based on the teachings of a 19th century Austrian occultist. Part of my education in Waldorf included mandatory assemblies where we watched religious pageants reminiscent of Medieval mystery plays. One of the plays performed most often– at least once a year– was the Paradise Play. The Paradise play was a re-enactment of the fall from Eden. It was always really boring until the Devil showed up, played by a teacher in a wild costume and lots of red and orange fiery makeup. No one really clapped or cheered for anyone but the Devil, even though the play was clearly supposed to be on the side of God. 

I sat through this damn play so many times that I inevitably started to notice that the Devil was right. God was controlling, misogynist, an anti-intellectual, and even seemed to want to discourage the consumption of healthy produce. The beginnings of my Luciferian conversion happened right there, around the age of twelve, sitting in an uncomfortable little wooden chair in a Waldorf assembly hall. 

Whatever the catalyst for rebellion– be it new ideas, exposure to exciting media, a ‘cooler’ and more daring set of friends, or simply the onset of teenage hormones– once rebellion against the parents has been set in motion, it is impossible to stop. 

Hell truly hath no fury like a teenager who has begun to question the rules. Eating the forbidden fruit is painful. They don’t call it teen angst for nothing. The awakening of libido is confusing enough without all the other tasks of adolescence– forming an identity, growing a different body, developing a moral compass, coming up with your own ideas and opinions about the world. Teens wake up not just to themselves, but to the realities of unjust societies. Life is not a happy walled garden, as it may have seemed in childhood. There is struggle, and pain, and war and death and unfairness. There is evil. Once you take a bite of that apple and have those revelations, there’s no going back to the way things were. 

Parents respond to teenage rebellion in various ways. If they are good parents, they find ways to reconcile with their children and accept their new identities. If they are bad parents they react with anger and excessive punishment– and may even kick their kids out of the house, as God did with Adam and Eve. 

But whether parents are kind and fair or not, we all eventually have to leave the nest and fend for ourselves. Our lives and actions become our own responsibilities. This is hard and painful, but also rewarding. It is the price of freedom. (In a capitalist society, that price is way higher than it needs to be, but that’s another sermon.)

Many people are attracted to Satanism, I think, partly because they sense that this religion will not judge them for having complicated feelings about their parents– or even cutting their parents off entirely. Lucifer made a clean break with his Father, after all. They’ve been no-contact since the dawn of time! 

Satanists, in other words, are often not just apostates from their original religions, but also from their families. In practical terms, that’s often what being an apostate from a religion means, if you were raised in it. 

Fortunately, we have no enshrined virtue of filial piety here. “Honor thy father and thy mother” is not a commandment we are bound by. We recognize that parents are human beings, and imperfect, some good and some bad and some worse. Some of them are not worthy of honor from their children, and some are not worthy of honor from much of anyone at all. 

Of course we do not vilify all parents. Many of us are lucky enough to have one or more decent parents. Many of us will someday be parents ourselves. 

And to those of you who will be parents, I want to propose a new virtue– parental piety. Don’t tell your children to honor you– honor them. When their Eden moment comes, and rebellion kicks in, remember your own adolescence. Adam and Eve certainly went through great pains with their own children, like when little Cain got mad, hit his brother on the head, and accidentally discovered death. If being a child is hard, being a parent is no easier.

The difference is that parents are adults. They have eaten of the fruit of knowledge. They know good and evil, they know right from wrong. They know better, in other words– or at least, they are supposed to. 

So instead of bellowing at kids to “honor thy father and thy mother,” let’s tell parents to gently honor their children. “Honor” is a great big concept, too meaty for a small child to grasp. You may work your fingers to the bone providing for your kids, cleaning up their messes, washing them, feeding them, and clothing them– but a kid will never understand what the hell that means, not really. Not until they are grown enough to have to do all that for themselves, and maybe even for their own offspring. Demanding gratitude from kids is a waste of time. They can’t even conceptualize what they’re meant to be grateful for. 

Instead, you be grateful for your kids. Remind yourself that it is a privilege and an honor to bring them into the world and raise them– that above all, it is a privilege to know them. Forget this at your peril, because otherwise you may find yourself old and lonely, wondering why they never write, call or visit. If you were a good parent, one day they will express their gratitude– I guarantee it. If they never do, you likely don’t deserve it. 

I want to end this sermon on a personal note. As some of you may know, early this year I cut off all contact with my biological mother. Since I did that, my life has gotten immeasurably better. I have now moved across the country without telling my mother my new address, and am absolutely delighted to know that ze probably has no idea where I even live. 

As my thirty-second birthday approaches, I find myself a little bit triggered. I know ze will be thinking about me, on the anniversary of the day on which ze expelled me from zir body, an arduous and painful act for which I can still feel gratitude and respect, if for nothing else. I know ze will want to contact me on that day, or try to send me a present. I’m experiencing anxiety at the idea of a package or card forwarded to me from my old address– a guilt trip wrapped in birthday wishes, a gift with heavy strings attached. I can’t imagine anything I want less. 

Ze probably has no idea why I cut off contact. I’m not usually a fan of “if you don’t know why I’m mad, I can’t tell you,” but at this point I’ve given up on trying to explain to my mother the ways that ze has damaged me, and continues to damage me. I’ve given up on trying to draw boundaries with a person who immediately moves the goalposts, whose response to any request for privacy and respect is “I know you said you don’t wanna hear about X, but…” 

I recognize that my mother is traumatized, that my mother’s parents were even worse at parenting than ze was. I have compassion. And, I have absolutely no desire to know zir or talk to zir ever again. It has been decades since I had an interaction with my mother that was anything less than exhausting. Quite simply, I’m done. 

And, I know my mother used to read my Satanic blog. I have blocked zir on wordpress, but that doesn’t stop zir from looking at my site while logged out. My fear of zir eyes on my words, and the violation thereof, has stopped me from posting publicly. It has silenced my voice on a platform that I was using to interact with my religious community. 

So today, I am going to be brave. After this service concludes, I will post this on my blog. If mom reads it, I don’t care. I believe I have something to offer to others through my words and my writing. I’m done shutting up. I know I have Lucifer in my corner when I speak up on my own behalf, in spite of my fear of my parent. I know the demons are rooting for me and supporting me in finding and building a family that supports me and brings me joy. 

I hope you know that you, too, have the forces of Hell on your side as you struggle with any pain your parents have caused you. Our independence, our self-determination, our individually developed identities, are precious and sacred. We can and will step beyond the shadows cast by our Creators, and into our own radiant light.

Be it so. 

Reblog if you are a Luciferian, Satanist or Demonolator.

My dash is too quiet. I need new people to follow. 

Can’t guarantee I will follow all of you because, well… you know how it is, us LHP types can’t always get along. But please reblog anyway to help us all find kindred spirits. Your blog might not be to my taste but it may be to someone else’s along the reblog chain!

To help us all out, feel free to put a brief description of your path in your reblog or in comments.

I’m a theistic Luciferian Satanist (Lucifer is my Satan and my path has stereotypical Luciferian and Satanic elements). 

Review: “The Synagogue of Satan” by Stanislaw Przybyszewski

This book was a frustrating experience. 

It started out full of promise, with passages of breathtaking beauty that seemed to capture the essence of Lucifer in a way that few texts can. 

Then a bit of confusing Nietzsche fanboyism crept in. Then came boatloads of soft polytheism. 

Then it moved into a retelling of the history of the Church that was flawed, biased and inaccurate on a Margaret Murray level. 

Finally, it ended on a note of sour nihilism. 

The portrayal of a beautiful, brilliant Satan in the beginning was degraded and twisted by the end. The one who had promised infinite gnosis and liberation was ultimately shown as offering only idiotic escapism and joyless intoxication. 

It was weird. It felt like the author started out with one idea of Satan and ended with another. It felt like a book that didn’t know what it wanted to be, devoid of consistent opinions, values or theology. The Promethean Lightbringer turns bitter and becomes the cruel, petty enemy of God and Christianity, even tormenting his own devotees to alleviate his frustration. In that sense, this ended up being a very Christian book– the character arc of Satan mirrored that in Paradise Lost. 

I have never read something that started out so moving and promising and ended so mediocre and empty. It reads exactly like what Christians think the experience of Satanism is– promises and dreams that crumble away to nothingness and pain. 

Can’t recommend, although I’ve posted some of the better passages from early on as quotes on this blog. 

That said, it’s interesting to read such a blatantly Satanic and little-known book from the 19th century. (And despite the problematic-sounding title, it contains very little antisemitism.)

My Reading and Resource List (Updated)

  • The Bible 
  • The Qur’an Will tell you nothing about Lucifer, because as a Satanic figure he is only present in Christianity. However, his Muslim opposite number, Iblis, is an arresting figure in his own right. You can learn a lot by comparing and contrasting these two entities. Also, Lucifer wants you to seek knowledge! In this time of rising Islamophobia, refuse to be ignorant. Learn about Islam.
  • Sefaria.org Collection of Jewish texts including the Torah. Side-by-side English and Hebrew.
  • Gnosis.org Collection of Gnostic texts.
  • Complete Books of Enoch, Dr. A Nyland Finding a lot that is profitable in this translation and the commentary. Learn about the Watchers and their kids, the Nephilim!
  • Pseudepigrapha.com Giant online collection of apocrypha and pseudepigrapha. Seems to be run by a Mormon. Sure.
  • Lucifer: Princeps by Peter Grey. Peter Grey is a bit of a blowhard, but this is a very useful book. I recommend it reluctantly but strongly. It’s primarily a survey of scriptural, apocryphal, and mythological sources for the Lucifer legend, and as such it’s quite valuable.
  • The Luminous Stone, diverse collection of writings on Lucifer from a number of Western occult and historical perspectives. A mixed bag. But hey, it’s writing specifically about Luciferianism that wasn’t done by Michael Ford, and therefore it is precious.
  • Hemaphrodeities by Raven Kaldera. Good book on transgender spirituality in general, sections on Lilith and Baphomet may be of particular interest.
  • The Devil: A New Biography by Philip C. Almond. History of the “idea” of the Christian Devil, traces his origins in scripture. Includes a bunch of fascinating and entertaining material on witchcraft in the middle ages, witch trials, exorcisms and possessions. (Did you know Catholics and Protestants were literally using possessions and exorcisms as a way of talking shit about each other? This and other fun facts in the book!)
  • The Birth of Satan by Gregory Mobley and T.J. Wray. Retraces a lot of ground covered in the first two chapters of the book above, but in way more detail. An analysis of the scriptural sources for Satan. Good, fast read.
  • The Book of Adam and Eve (Latin version) Contains an early version of the fall of Satan which probably inspired the account of the fall of Iblis in the Qu’ran.
  • All the Kabbalah You Really Need to Know A video lecture given by a friend of mine. Great crash-course.
  • The Devil’s Bride by Martin Ebon a neat little book about exorcism from a psychological stand point– particularly about demonic possession and exorcism as a cathartic ritual which leads to emotional healing. Reads as fairly skeptical but is surprisingly open-minded about ESP and psychokinesis. But not demons. OK! We all have our biases, I guess. Anyway, it’s a fun read, but by no means essential.
  • A Dictionary of Angels Including the Fallen Angels by Gustav Davidson What it says on the tin. Shouldn’t be your only source but if you happen to find yourself wondering who the fuck Cabriel is this probably beats Wikipedia for a first stop. Nicely cited and will lead you straight to better sources.
  • A History of Witchcraft: Sorcerers, Heretics and Pagans by Jeffrey Burton Russell A neat, elaborately illustrated little history of witchcraft aimed at the layperson, by a scholar who has written much lengthier works on the subject that I will soon be reading. Not perfect but fairly legit.
  • God and the State by Mikhail Bakunin Satanic anarchy?! Not really, except for the first chapter or so. Still, worth the read!
  • The Tawasin of Mansur Al-Hallaj Interested in Iblis/Satan in Islam/Sufism? This is essential.
  • On the Origin of the World Trippy gnostic gospel, including retelling of Eden sympathetic to the Snake and to eating the damn fruit.
  • The Testament of Solomon Potentially useful demonology and also weirdly goddamn funny.
  • The Lesser Key of Solomon Get your Goetia on.
  • Demoniality by Ludovico Sinistrari. A weirdly sympathetic Catholic text about Incubi.
  • Compendium Maleficarum An old witch-hunting manual. Contains a description of a supposed Satanic witchcraft initiation/black baptism, which I adapted for my own use with great success. Also lots of fascinating history and exciting spell ideas!
  • Zohar.com Do yourself a favor and create a fucking account. It’s free. Search one of the most fascinating occult texts and one of the most important sources on demonology, particularly regarding the Devil’s four consorts.
  • The Revolt of the Angels, Anatole France Amusing philosophical Luciferian novel.
  • Paradise Lost, John Milton Because your image of Lucifer probably comes largely from this. And also, because it’s amazing.
  • Duino Elegies, Rilke “Who, if I shouted, among the hierarchy of Angels, would hear me?“
  • Litanies of Satan, Baudelaire Just gorgeous, perfect for use as a prayer.
  • Eloa, Alfred de Vigny Not necessarily much spiritual content, but it’s fun. A poem about Lucifer seducing an angel.
  • The Demon, Mikhail Lermontov Apparently romantic poetry about Satan seducing pure-hearted maidens is practically a genre. This is more fun than Eloa.
  • The Marriage of Heaven and Hell, William Blake Beautiful, trippy, pro-Satanic, a fast read. Link is to full text.
  • La-Bas, Joris-Karl Huysmans A 19th century novel about Satanism. Gruesome, disturbing and not really Satan positive, but helpful for understanding how Satanism has been conceptualized.